Parenting Twins

Posted in: Babies, Parenting, Podcast, Relationships  |  January 19, 2013 at 1:28 pm
4 comments
Family with Twins

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Updated: Now with episode 43: Parenting Twins – Chapter 2

I babysat for friends with seven year old  twin boys a few weeks ago. It was from 6pm so I got to hang out with them for an hour and a half before teeth, toilet and bedtime. I’ve never really spent much time around twins and there’s just something so fascinating about them! I spent the first five minutes just looking at them – my head going back and forth like I was watching a tennis match. They are very very ‘identical’. When they returned home, I asked the parents what the most common question they got asked about the boys. Interestingly, “Who was born first?” was what most people wanted to know.

I was so intrigued that I asked the parents Tim and Michelle to come into the studio to share their stories and tips for ‘parenting twins’. Click the player to Listen to Part 1 of our Parenting Twis podcast. While Tim suggests booking friends who offer help, in to a specific time and date to help get through the ‘dark ages’, Michelle recommends writing a ‘letter to yourself’ at the end of your pregnancy to look back on.

We’ve also had some great discussion going on our IOTTM facebook page.

“Make sure you don’t have people singling one out as being ‘the cutest’ or ‘prettiest’ or ‘smartest’ etc, its a really natural thing for people to do when there’s twins, but could be so damaging when theyre old enough to understand” Kathy Roscoe, NZ

Especially this comment from Sian Stewart who said “Having twins is awesome. The first 4 months is really seriously hard work and you wonder ‘How are we ever going to do this? Raise 2 babies who need the same thing at the same time?’ But once you are rocking a routine and find your groove it all just falls into place and you marvel every day at what an amazing bond they have and feel ripped off that you aren’t a twin!”

Twin girls

“Having the twins is definitely double blessings”.

Many parents also recommended joining a ‘Multiple Birth Club’ or something similar like the Auckland Central Multiple Birth Club . They strive to “address the special and unique needs of families experiencing a multiple birth, by providing and sharing information, advice and support to those involved with the care and raising and wellbeing of multiples”.

Top Tips and Words of Wisdom for Parenting Twins

* Thanks Michelle and Tim and some of our other followers:

  • Be prepared for sheer hell on wheels for the first 6 months, then when youve got them sussed sit back and marvel at them AND yourself!
  • Keep a feeding journal/timesheet with name of child and which side or how much bottle they got. Things are such a blur that you forget.
  • Join a ‘Parents of Multiples’ group for tips, advice, support, gear etc.
  •  They are harder in a lot of ways at the beginning but once over 2, the joy and laughs more than double.
  • Hire a baby whisperer, au pair or friend to help.
  • When friends offer help, book them in and give them a specific date and time. And text to remind them!
  • It gets even more interesting and fun when they are teens and then adults.
  • Write a letter to yourself at the end of your pregnancy with thoughts, advice etc.
  • Take lots of photos – especially in the newborn stage.

Ingrid Ambus from Canada (*mother of the cute girls pictured above) commented that “My girls always have a willing buddy to play with, stick up for each other, make each other laugh, and of course gang up on their parents when they’re not listening/being naughty!”

What are your ‘words of wisdom’ or Top Tips for parenting twins?

Keep an eye out for upcoming blogs about Twins + 1 or +2 (having twins plus more kids).

Episode 43: Parenting Twins Part 2

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Written by

Raised in Toronto Canada, Nat received the 'enthusiasm award' in Grade 7 and not much has changed. She has always loved bringing people together and challenging them to be more than they thought possible. Her background includes Personal Development, Corporate Team Building and Environmental Education. She now lives in Auckland New Zealand with her husband Matt (Nat & Matt) and their 3 children Ruby, Jonah and Xavier. Nat's excited to be blogging again (previously blogged for 'Eco Centric') and sharing parenting and relationship stories with others around the world.
  • Jacqui Lockington

    Now interestingly, I am lucky enough to live next door to Michelle and Tim and their gorgeous Twin boys. Whereas I struggle to be able to tell them apart, it amazes me that my son can tell them apart easily. He cannot understand it when I ask him…How do you know that’s Jax??

    It would be really interesting to get some stories from parents of identical twins younger or even older than Jax and Zan and whether the older ones play tricks on their friends/ school teachers pretending each one is the other….!!

  • Michelle

    Jax and Zan are really excited this year Jacqui, because for the first time, they are going to be in separate classes at school. The upside to them – they get to choose their own school t-shirt colour! For the last couple years, they had to wear the same shirt every day e.g. Zan green stripes, Jax in red… . so that the teachers can tell them apart. While this works, its actually a bit annoying for the boys that people cannot tell them apart…. it gets particularly hard at some activities that require the same uniform… I feel a bit sorry for the soccer coach ! Anyhow, the boys did sometimes switch shirts last year, confusing the whole class and teachers alike! They thought it was great!

  • Laura

    I have 4 kids – 5 yrs, 2 yrs & 6-month identical twins… in addition, I nanny for 3 kiddos… it was fun listening to your podcast :-)

    • http://www.ifonlytheytoldme.com Nat

      Thanks for your comment Laura. Glad you enjoyed the podcast! It’s actually had over 600 downloads now. We’re planning a follow-up blog and podcast about Twins + kids so maybe you can give us a quote and comment for the blog? email me if you’re keen: comments@ifonlytheytoldme.com xo Nat